Top 10 Reasons the Yankees Annoy Me
10. Living in the past - Yankee fans were always the first to yell about how the Sox hadn't won a series since 1918. They're all "here and now" when it suits their purpose. But in every other argument they resurrect artifacts with more fervor than Indiana Jones. Just to name a few... Babe Ruth, Lou Gehrig, and every mention of about 21 of their 26 World Series titles.
9. The pinstripes - I'm sorry. I just don't like the look, on anybody. Pinstripes don't symbolize speed, grace, or anything related to sports. They symbolize staunch, stuffed-shirt, pomposity.
8. The emblem - Again, Yankee fans may argue that it is the most popular insignia ever, almost as universally recognized as, well, the swastika, but I fail to see the beauty. Who the hell came up with that font? Take a look at it broken apart:
7. New York City - I know it hasn't been cool to complain about NYC since 9/11, but for every good/great thing about that metropolis, there is at least on bad/horrible thing. The last time I was there, I stood next to a man pissing in a bottle at 2 in the afternoon. We were in front of FAO Schwartz. Any questions?
6. RDD - Retail Delusional Disorder - You see, Yankee fans talk about a how the Yankee emblem and Yankee gear is the most popular of all teams. While this is certainly true, the fans never talk about just why. Sure, they have a huge fan base. No argument there. But the Yankee logo has become a fashion statement. There is a rather large segment of the population that wears the logo not because they know anything or care in the least about the Yankees. They have as much loyalty to the Bronx Bombers as they do the Dolce & Gabbana, or Fendi. Then you need to add in the rapper crowd that wears Yankee colors as a statement, but not the statement, "New York Yankees are the finest in baseball." I believe that if you could round up every person in the country that owns an article of officially licensed Yankee gear, that less than half would be able to tell you who the current manager is, how many rings the Yankees have, or what song is played at the end of games at Yankee stadium.
5. No Heart - While many teams (especially the Red Sox) have high priced talent, the Yankees players, more often than not, seem like hired guns. They smile little and they seem more like 1960's FBI agents than guys who get paid a ton of money to play the wonderful game of baseball.
4. No Loyalty - Yankees have no objections to taking the high-priced, high talented player that they ridiculed and screamed profanity at the season before. They took Damon, they tried for Martinez (after all that who's your daddy crap.)
3. The Rules - No, not the Joba Rules, though they annoy me, too. I'm referring to the no facial hair, no long hair, no personality, no style, no fun rules. Like I said, 1960's FBI.
2. The Steinbrenners - I always get asked the question about why I can stomach the Red Sox $146 million budget, but the Yankees payroll annoys me. The answer is the ownership. I can't impugn the business sense of these lads. They've created one of the most successful businesses in the world. But I'm not particularly interested in the business side of baseball. To me, it is the downside, to be sure. But if there is any doubt that business is the prime motivator for the Steinbrenners, I need to be versed. Sure, they make moves to win. But these moves are made with all the passion of an Exxon board meeting. Success is what they crave. Defeating the foes. Making as much money as humanly possible. Being able to pat themselves on the back. There is no love of baseball exhibited. There is absolutely nothing done in the name of fun. But worst of all, it is the ownership that is 50% responsible for the hatred that many feel for the Yankees. It's not the fact that they win so much. It's stories like that of Billy Martin, and now Joe Torre, showing the true hearts of the men at the helm, that sour so many to the Yankees.
1. The fans - Finally, the other 50%. The reason why the Yankees are hated is the people who love them. This vulgar group of sophomores that spends more time jeering at the Red Sox than they do cheering for the Yankees when the two teams play. The real reason the rivalry stays so heated no matter what. The way they can never, ever admit that anything the front office does was a mistake. The way the lambaste Sox fans for doing some of the same things that are accepted in Yankee fan circles. (Accents being the first thing that comes to mind.) While nothing could ever ruin the game for me, these folks come the closest. The constant ranting about 26 rings, blah, blah, blah. They try to sell you their team, ,talking about how wonderful and winning it is, then cry and moan about the "Pink Hat Brigade", the neo-Sox fans who have become Sox fans because of the team's recent success. Isn't jumping the bandwagon exactly what they'd like us to be doing? The issue isn't jumping on the bandwagon, its the wagon that gets chosen. Most of all, I get the impression that most of these fans are truly happiest when they are actively making some other, non-Yankee fan miserable.
9. The pinstripes - I'm sorry. I just don't like the look, on anybody. Pinstripes don't symbolize speed, grace, or anything related to sports. They symbolize staunch, stuffed-shirt, pomposity.
8. The emblem - Again, Yankee fans may argue that it is the most popular insignia ever, almost as universally recognized as, well, the swastika, but I fail to see the beauty. Who the hell came up with that font? Take a look at it broken apart:
7. New York City - I know it hasn't been cool to complain about NYC since 9/11, but for every good/great thing about that metropolis, there is at least on bad/horrible thing. The last time I was there, I stood next to a man pissing in a bottle at 2 in the afternoon. We were in front of FAO Schwartz. Any questions?
6. RDD - Retail Delusional Disorder - You see, Yankee fans talk about a how the Yankee emblem and Yankee gear is the most popular of all teams. While this is certainly true, the fans never talk about just why. Sure, they have a huge fan base. No argument there. But the Yankee logo has become a fashion statement. There is a rather large segment of the population that wears the logo not because they know anything or care in the least about the Yankees. They have as much loyalty to the Bronx Bombers as they do the Dolce & Gabbana, or Fendi. Then you need to add in the rapper crowd that wears Yankee colors as a statement, but not the statement, "New York Yankees are the finest in baseball." I believe that if you could round up every person in the country that owns an article of officially licensed Yankee gear, that less than half would be able to tell you who the current manager is, how many rings the Yankees have, or what song is played at the end of games at Yankee stadium.
5. No Heart - While many teams (especially the Red Sox) have high priced talent, the Yankees players, more often than not, seem like hired guns. They smile little and they seem more like 1960's FBI agents than guys who get paid a ton of money to play the wonderful game of baseball.
4. No Loyalty - Yankees have no objections to taking the high-priced, high talented player that they ridiculed and screamed profanity at the season before. They took Damon, they tried for Martinez (after all that who's your daddy crap.)
3. The Rules - No, not the Joba Rules, though they annoy me, too. I'm referring to the no facial hair, no long hair, no personality, no style, no fun rules. Like I said, 1960's FBI.
2. The Steinbrenners - I always get asked the question about why I can stomach the Red Sox $146 million budget, but the Yankees payroll annoys me. The answer is the ownership. I can't impugn the business sense of these lads. They've created one of the most successful businesses in the world. But I'm not particularly interested in the business side of baseball. To me, it is the downside, to be sure. But if there is any doubt that business is the prime motivator for the Steinbrenners, I need to be versed. Sure, they make moves to win. But these moves are made with all the passion of an Exxon board meeting. Success is what they crave. Defeating the foes. Making as much money as humanly possible. Being able to pat themselves on the back. There is no love of baseball exhibited. There is absolutely nothing done in the name of fun. But worst of all, it is the ownership that is 50% responsible for the hatred that many feel for the Yankees. It's not the fact that they win so much. It's stories like that of Billy Martin, and now Joe Torre, showing the true hearts of the men at the helm, that sour so many to the Yankees.
1. The fans - Finally, the other 50%. The reason why the Yankees are hated is the people who love them. This vulgar group of sophomores that spends more time jeering at the Red Sox than they do cheering for the Yankees when the two teams play. The real reason the rivalry stays so heated no matter what. The way they can never, ever admit that anything the front office does was a mistake. The way the lambaste Sox fans for doing some of the same things that are accepted in Yankee fan circles. (Accents being the first thing that comes to mind.) While nothing could ever ruin the game for me, these folks come the closest. The constant ranting about 26 rings, blah, blah, blah. They try to sell you their team, ,talking about how wonderful and winning it is, then cry and moan about the "Pink Hat Brigade", the neo-Sox fans who have become Sox fans because of the team's recent success. Isn't jumping the bandwagon exactly what they'd like us to be doing? The issue isn't jumping on the bandwagon, its the wagon that gets chosen. Most of all, I get the impression that most of these fans are truly happiest when they are actively making some other, non-Yankee fan miserable.
Labels: baseball, fan, obnoxious fans, Red Sox, Yankees, Yankers
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on Sunday, March 02, 2008 at 3/02/2008 09:52:00 AM.
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